"DID YOU CHECK YOUR ZIPPER?”

aprithot:

YEAH NO SHIT HONEY

totheinternetandbeyond:

wecanbreatheinouterspace:

totheinternetandbeyond:

I lost the cap to a soda bottle

Then you’re fucking stupid. If you can’t drink a soda without a cap, then you’re fucking stupid. 

LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT. I COULDN’T FIND THE CAP TO AN ALMOST FULL 2 LITER BOTTLE OF DIET COKE. I WASN’T ABOUT TO DRINK THE WHOLE GOD DAMN THING ON THE SPOT. I DONT EVEN LIKE DIET COKE THAT MUCH. IF I PUT IT IN THE FRIDGE IN THE BOTTLE IT WOULD HAVE GONE FLAT SO DONT FUCKING CALL ME STUPID I AM THE FUTURE

moshquitoes:

bovveredforsooth:

Daddy came home from work today. 

Everyone needs this on their dash.

I think I’m going to cry

yeatru:

awwww-cute:

A Seeing Eye Dog on his first day


he knows he’s gonna do such a good job
CREDIT